Managing with limited energy

With many chronic conditions, people can experience a limited amount of daily energy. We can represent this by a set number of “spoons”. Every task, including small ones, uses spoons and can make even routine tasks feel overwhelming. Recognising this can help us support the person to prioritise, rest and feel understood rather than pressured to “push through”.

This can be a really helpful analogy to use with children and young people. While most children start the day with plenty of spoons, a child with chronic fatigue (or a condition that causes fatigue) begins with fewer - and everyday tasks like getting dressed, concentrating at school or socialising with friends can use them up. Once their spoons run out, the young person may feel exhausted, irritable or in more pain.

Tips on how to use this to support your young person:
✨Plan ahead: Help your child prioritise important activities and spread out energy-draining ones.
✨Validate and explain: Use the spoon idea to help family and teachers understand that your child isn’t lazy - they’re managing the best they can with reduced energy.
✨Build in rest: Schedule quiet breaks or “spoon recharging” moments through the day.
✨Balance, not perfection: Encourage pacing - some days they’ll have more spoons, some less and that’s okay. We encourage young people to try to ‘spread’ their spoons over the week, aiming for consistent activity, rather than opting for spending all the spoons in one day.
✨Celebrate small wins: Notice what they can do and praise effort, not just outcomes.

✏️ Try drawing out your young person’s jar of spoons with them. Work out together how many spoons each of their ‘must do’ tasks take up. Try to map out how to make sure the spoons cover essential as well as enjoyable tasks, and that they are ‘spent’ across the day rather than all at once.